Arse Poetica 2003

  (Shitting pretty,
Calcutta becomes
the butt
of crappy jokes.)

They make a fast buck
out of our scatological disgust:
Calcutta's anus horribilis.

Vendors of excreta,
selling foul-looking globs
on blue plastic sheets atop pavements
near the city's cinema halls.

Why on earth, you ask.

Artificial stools --
made of wax, raisin and lacquer --
apparently come in handy
for commuters in crowded trains
to reserve their seats with.
(If you don't believe this,
take a trip along a suburban route
anyday during rush hour).

A sordid city of 13 million,
with some being forced to live
from hand to arse to mouth:
to feed his kids,
someone has to make
lifelike human faeces,
and another to hawk it,

"Goo! goo! For one, for all!
Five rupees, ten rupees,
only seven rupees!
Goo for one, goo for all!
Put them on your boss' chair,
gift them to friend or foe,
mail them to that jilt.
Put them on train seats,
and go to office like a king
in an empty bogie at 11 am!
Goo for one, goo for all!"

Srinjay Chakravarti

Goo: Bengali for turd.

If you've any comments on this poem, Srinjay Chakravarti would be pleased to hear from you.