Cinema Verité
She realized that if her life were a movie:
they would have filmed the
production at Hunt's point in the Bronx,
when it was too cold for the bums, pushers and cops,
and the executive producer would have helped out as second prop
man,
while first prop man found huge bargains at the Salvation Army,
the director's resume would include,
Attack of the Octopus Women, and Blood
Feast of the Venusian Virgins,
the film editor, who once edited Japanese monster movies,
would splice the beginning and end into the middle,
so the scene where she finds true romance with Lars during a
chance European encounter
would suddenly cut to her wedding with Seymour the sleepy
accountant,
they would list the role of this Seymour, her husband of
many years,
in the closing credits as the second bald man on the right,
her childhood scenes would appear in the beginning and end of the
film,
her three children would have leading roles all played by the
same transvestite,
who, even after the obligatory nude scene, might be either an
actor or actress,
it would run in the theaters for half a week
and appear in the back shelves of video stores a week later,
and her part would be played not by herself but by her mother,
who'd probably win an Oscar for least supporting actress.
Richard Fein
If you've any comments about this poem, Richard Fein would be pleased to hear from you.