Red-Hot
Always the fear, post-practice - Red-hot smeared all over your balls. Starters, they're the ones who'll do it, linebackers left back, at least a year too big, hungry to match the coaching specs. Those who in and out of scrimmage hurl their bulk like moral imperatives into the blocking sled unjustly weighted down by three unmoved movers, the barking assistant coaches' heads. Hustle up for wind-sprints, bear down in three-point crouch to get some cleat of praise: "Your name son? I like the way you hit." But when the molded mouthguards float in locker pools of salivated sweat, itís something altogether different. Between the steamy shower and the hop-on athlete's foot dispenser, hidden in a wadded towel that may or may not mean more comradely whipcracking horseplay - the can of Red-hot lifted from the trainerís bag. The spoil-sport is the coward who must be eliminated from the game. Or else he must eject himself. Ask cheerleaders, marching band, fans in the bleachers howling; the pep rally and scored piped to every classroom. No way out but unfaked injury: groin or hamstring shoulder separation, heroes limp off field refusing team-mate prop, pain walked-off, shrugged-off, transformed to vengeful sack or clip, roughing excused - all violations impossible from my place on the bench. And so I have to injure myself. At home I let the five-pound barbell drop from dresser down, to smash my propped-up wrist, unable even to raise a bruise - though later the unshattered arm begins to throb. Into the night the soreness stays. The next day, because it is the Day of Atonement, my parents make me go to synagogue, where old men rue the passing of the time when they could buy a cock, and by swinging it around their heads three times and muttering a prayer, transfer their sins to it. As the pain subsides, displaced by fasting pangs, I realize I'll have to make a story up, borrow my mother's old ace bandage and talk my sister into binding up my wrist, succumbing to the strains and dislocations and the succor of the Kol Nidre, forgiving us again from debt and contractual obligation. A young optometrist plays the fiddle. And the engineer's widow with the trained voice sings. Leonard Kress
If you've any comments on this poem, Leonard Kress would be pleased to hear from you.